Well hello again!
I find it interesting how the medicine I am taking seems to control my emotions. For the most part, I am generally happy. Then suddenly I am in full panic mode, and can't control it. Take earlier this evening for example. My dad brought me the mail from yesterday, and there was a package from the neurosurgeons office with pre-registration forms and such. It also talks about payments. It says that the deductible must be paid up front, and if surgery is required, then all patient fees are to be paid prior to surgery. Really? That will at least be $5000. Oh did I mention I do not have that kind of money? I wouldn't have it even if I had been able to work the last month, but I sure don't have it now! What normal person has that kind of money just laying around? Seriously!
Well. I had a mini freak out session. You know the kind where you complain about your circumstances, as if it is someone elses fault. You question every little thing needlessly because it is the weekend and you can't get answers until Monday - if then. And the best part of the mini freak out? The tears!! You cry as if the world has completely mistreated you. What? Don't even try to tell me that you haven't done that before! I am NOT the only loon in this world! Oh, and then...? It all goes away just as quickly as it came about. Now, I know for certain a large part of that is because of the medicine. I didn't do this nearly so bad until I started these pain meds..
Another yucky thing about the meds is that after taking such a high dose for this amount of time..they start making you itch. Then, if you are lucky...you get a rash! Oh, and if you scratch when it itches, it only makes it itch more. But if you are strong enough not to scratch, it goes away much faster. Yeah, so, I have several lil red, rashy places. It's greatness!
I know I am being sarcastic about all of this, but sometimes you just have to laugh and make jokes. Or else...
You will end up screaming. Then people really think you are crazy. Don't believe me? Go ahead, try it. Let me know how that goes for you, ok? Heh!
Until next time...
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